CEASER

food for the hungry

Tue, 10 Aug 2004 03:58:01 GMT

I Hadn't read Lj in a while and its fun to see how people's lives progress and in some cases retrogade. how some friends of mine ivolve and mature, how others spend their lives in a vicious cycle and somehow end up blaming their unhappiness and bitch about everyone else.
either way i love my friends till the end even if they never understand or are blur for something or someone know that im there. how maya angelou of me

one of the greatest poets/musicans over our time sang-
A groupie call, you fall from temptation
Now you wanna ball over separation
Tarnish my image in your conversation
Who you gon' scrimmage, like you the champion
You might win some but you just lost one
You might win some but you just lost one
Now, now how come your talk turn cold
Gained the whole world for the price of your soul
Tryin' to grab hold of what you can't control
Now you're all floss, what a sight to behold
Wisdom is better than silver and gold - lauryn hill
GENIOUS GENIOUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

all this weekend i hung out with christopher cicconne (maddonnas brother) and without going into detail i must say i was expecting more.

ohhhhhhh la laaaaaa

Tue, 25 May 2004 17:36:40 GMT

Gay pride

Ohhhhhhh my goodness. Complete an utter insanity. I wish i hadn’t signed the pact
Of silence and could expose the dirty laundry. Or maybe ill go get hypnotize so i can remember from my rolling blackouts.
It was incredibly insane, one of the best prides ever. I hate gayness and having had spend it with such a good crowd maybe me quite loud and proud. Ahh my friends are the shit yo!
I even took Monday off to recover and im still half comatose.
If pictures re surface just remember people often look alike and i wouldn’t be doing that. You dont know meeeeeeeeeeeeee.

I am no revolver but i can shoot like one.

That’s not just a personal sexual innuendo either. Now this aint rambling but bear with my self-reflection! If at the end i sound crazy blame it all on Mr. acid dr. Timothy leery for providing in my youth an opening to certain doors in my head that should of remained closed. Or even worse my nana for only have had the entire collection of books,” Chicken soup” for that, for this, for it all “. Having to have read them all by 14 is sure to have done something strange to my persona. Straight to the point shooter. Something really obscene happens when i let you be part of my intimate circle. Those friends/lovers/family members that i could completely trust with my deepest of feelings are sure to know what im talking about. There are two things i consciously am aware of at all times. Loyalty and Truth. Now it’s really obscene how i can completely give a fuck when unimportant people break these rules. But the minute those knight of my round table do it. Im crushed. I basically dont and wont let my self-get over shit. My repressive memory is shit. This ofcourse has always gotten me into dirty business. I can forgive but not forget so why even bother forgiving? Answer that dr. Phil. Im quite aware that people are going to let you down at one point of the relationship but im never ready for my close koalas to do so. Eh! In the end of it all. I was watching some show and basically you never know when the last time u talk to someone will be and if they’ve been there for you then that’s all it matters. Expectations out the window.

Madonna
tonight and Thursday. Woooo for free shit! I hope there’s no cute boys around me if or when she does Deeper and deeper, Bedtime Stories, and like a prayer because someone’s gonna get porked!

who's your best lover daddy
Someone this weekend asked me the to give the top 5 ethnic background that i have had sex with. Whom overall was the best sex ever. I didn’t really really really think of it till now. So here it is slutticas for whom ever is writing the next book on the best lovers of through out the world.

1. Portuguese
2. Cuban
3. Mexican/American
4. British
5. Spanish

SocialinassssssZzzzz

Thu, 20 May 2004 18:03:23 GMT

RAID the Social Butterfly RAID. Or as Markie would say die socialina Die! I have a problem and there’s no Anonymous association to help me! Im addicted to nightlife! Whether it be Clubs, restaurants, bars, parties, give me free booze throw in couple of "Celebs" and i wont say no. Which is part of the excuse for not updating LJ in what seem forever. Lately i’ve been circling life with 4 hours of sleep a night; Juggling work, working out, cruising School finals, VIPs events, my so called instable love life, and one of my best friends leaving the country. Can’t really complaint but i need rest damn it! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

So here’s a briefing of memorable events that have gone down. Now i can’t remember or in actually can’t expose most of the details. It be like being invited into Madonna’s kabbalah parties and then telling the press. You just dont or you mysteriously disappear. But here’s the run down with some juice.

More Andy Dick Action and the Fab Texas Terri

I dont recall what our intentions were that night but we ended up at the Gossip. The abfab Texas Terri was the honorary guest. Of course by the time we got to gossip it was close to 12:30 and we had missed most of her performance. But there was nothing like seeing her spit at people, jump on top of a bar, and sing her flawless rendition of the stooges ”no fun “. That night it was darlinka crew at hand Markie, Jacobi and yours truly. I remember taking a lot of shots from little tubes that reminded me of those candies“ ravens revenge,” that i loved so much as a small wee goth child. Somehow that night i had left my house with a mere $20 bucks, 7 drinks and 4 shots (i think) later, meal at canters; i still ended up going home with $25 dollars. HAHHA. Lets just say it involved femme fatale crassness. Caleb debutante Markie and modelesque Jacobi also be friended the now super homo Andy dick , im sure they made out with him as well. Puke puke. It was a complete blast. Of course we ruled the whole place! I was reminiscing old Club Cherry moments with Terry. When i danced there, she was my idol, “iggy pop in drag ” is what she was known as, you go figure. We use to do some crazy shit at that club. After kissing Terry we did a grand rendition of “London calling” by the clash” After the club so much went down... so much that we ended up getting home at 5 am but only two got home. what happen to the third rabbit Alice? If i told you my head would roll.

Jacobi, terri, Dick Smooching

Hudle with markie

god i look so punk trash gutter drunk in dolce,hahah

BPM Anniv. Party feat. Felix da housecat

After dodging a 3-foot rat, being disappointed windows was closed, drooling over Mel’s new Lamb big bag, we finally arrive at the Mayan theatre downtown. Lookin hot in DSL we soon come to find out the Mayan is at capacity and there’s 400+ people standing outside. Now there are very few nights through out the year that nightlife social butterflies navigate to one place. Include this one in the your two of hearts Stacey Q. All your electronica music snobs at hand were making me quite horny. So after a few heys! Let them in! some Vip action, and plenty of hating by the poor souls who would miss the show. Were in right in time for drinks and Felix! The man tore it all down. He did classics like the House of Yes but he remixed in some fisherpooner. Ofcourse Madam Hollywood this time with nirvanas smells like teen spirit. My fav the booty shaking remix of personal Jesus by DM. After his set we didn’t really care for techno junkie XL. Plus after the vip action you just cant stay there all night. Its just part of the rules! So we left to meet the kids at tigerballs. Scandolous like always. Good times good times

getting ready

felix

stoli flying ,booty shaking houuuuuuse music

Last night saw Nelly furtado I’m still in orgasmic pleasure

Partying with The Hilton Sister

Fri, 07 May 2004 17:34:27 GMT

Everybody knows that i just can’t say no to an invite that includes free booze and cheap celebrities. If you keep bribing me and i’ll give in. Last night i was just going to stay home and try to recover from Cinco de Mayo crassness. I get a call from Ginina one of my best friend from HS,
“Lets go out”,
“No thanks”.
“Im guest listed at el Centro”
“No im tired and have nothing to wear”
“I’ll buy you drinks”
“Ok but bring booze and red bull “.
Bitch picks drinking and me up and driving begins. A whole bottle of stoli and 7up later we arrive at El Centro. Now this club is the happening place in LA right now. You have to go through basically an alley way to get in, really ghetto, but once you get in there its a palace. So the line is huge we pull up looking all hot in Helmut Lang tank top and versace pants. Mel i hate you! You have my camera. My outfit was not documented, gay! I Stumble out of the car fucked up already. We by pass Jorge (security so so so hot) who hands genina 5 drink tickets. We decide we can’t stay long cause the place is not bumping, yet there’s a line outside! Go figure it’s los Angeles! I order these things they have call “cucarachas” it’s a shot of vodka with jagger they light it on fire and you have to zip with a straw when lit. Omg insane! So we’re at our booth chatting and Andy Dick comes over and starts talking to us. I thought he was there to hit on my friend ,double d’s! no his a fucken homo!!!! He bought me a drink were chatting being socialinas we get introduce to Nikki Hilton who may i add is hideous! Dancing boozing, this time i sort of begin to black out and make out with him grrrooooooossss hahhahhah his hideous but eh if your a celebrity ill make out with you. I guess. Close to midnight Andy and Genina decide were going to Tiger heat. Or was it i? We get in there and all Zumanity is lost. The minute we get in there andy is gone (later to be found with some 2 hot guys), genina no where to be found, thank god i found Francis and gigantor. I dont really recall much after this xpt a lot of dancing freaking sweaty twinks. Beating up andy eye candy on the dance floor always fun! Genina leaves at 1 cause she’s got a booty call in los feliz, i hitched a ride with gigantor. So im a wreck we go to Del taco and the most beautiful boy i have seen in a while wearing all Dsl55 walks in. beautiful brown eyes light brown hair fit boy. now i hate when “staring happens”. Ya know when both people keep looking at each other smiling staring but no one has the balls to say anything. This goes on for a while i wasnt allowed to say anything by gigantor cause as he put it “you’re so drunk ur going to make an ass out of urself” and sometimes when a boy i find irresistible strolls by im beyond shy. So i just kept staring we left and as the car was pulling away he waved, fuck shit ass!!!i’ll never see him again ohhhhhhhhhh. Now im at work hating my love for life eating locks and bagel feeling like a cartoon would after a giant safe landed on him.

soul dance

Tue, 04 May 2004 17:32:11 GMT

I LOVE WHEN QUEERS HOLD HANDS IN PUBLIC, NO SHAME IN THEIR GAME

Bitchesssssss get out and Register to Vote
I hate when people at school complain cause tuition is going up like hell. Why fags bitch about political homophobia. When chicks argue the right of choice. Yet im like well did you vote? No! Fuck you then !Fuck you! ohh Fuck you too if you think you’re vote isn’t gonna make a difference.. blah blah i hate Bush etc etc....with that said.

Coachella
was beyond amazing. like every other year, it never fails to surprise me and give me the biggest American boner of the year. So much scandal to even get into~~. I Will say im very happy my Donatella Versace glowing Tan is back and that i habe rockin friends.here's my top 10 performances of the festival

1. THE PIXIES- Nothing more than perfection. They were the band that transformed my junior high years always wishing to be just a little like Mrs. kim. What a fag! I was probably the annoying person who screams all the lyrics at the top of their lungs. Shrugs

2. BASEMENT JAXX- not only was i stoned, drunk, and two rows from the stage jamming next to a hot cowboy. but the whole damn set list was a groove shaking motha fuckin flawless soul dance. Gawwwd i even cried.

3.RADIOHEAD- I knew they were gonna kick ass, enough said. but i couldn’t have enjoyed it more than with Mel by my side.

4. KRAFTWERK- THE Granddaddies of electronica showed everyone why exactly ya must RESPECT bitch RESPECT!!!! pure perfection . Ecstasy within the old beats.

5. 2manydjs- who else can make you shake yo ass to Old dirty bastard, followed by Scissor sisters and Fisherspooner, all in one big house mix. I must of lost 5 pounds sweating to the jams.

6.Le tigre- ohhhh how Kathleen warms my heart. New music hot sheetz. Love the lesbian juices dancing around me

7.The Int. Noise Conspiracy- Revolutionary. I’ve seen them so many times yet they keep getting better, hotter.....

8.Atmosphere- There’s a new daddy MC in town.. move ova nigggaaaaaaaaaaaaas they’re here to stay

9.Kinky- i felt my soul shake and do the lambada

10.Erase Errata/Air- When opposites attract. So different yet so perfect in time.

Lollapalooooooooooosa
Damn !!! i just read MOZ And PJ Harvey are headlining Lolla 4 loosaa. I didn’t even know that shit still went on but i gots to go....The Grand Day of Glory will arrive when these crazy summer festivals come out with beautiful Air Conditioned Tents...i wont hold my breath 4 that to happen ever.

Summer time

Tue, 27 Apr 2004 18:48:15 GMT

Miami Miami here i come wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. It’s been booked June 21-27th. Were staying at the Royal Crown plaza in South Beach. Yay im so excited. Im for sure coming back darker than grace Jones in vamp. Ohh the debauchery

In other great news i cant stop looking at my new all time favorite picture of Amanda lepore.

shes such a piece of art

Coachella is a few days away...themadness ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Thu, 22 Apr 2004 18:31:00 GMT

Ran into this pic on the siteit was taken 2 years ago back at the original tigerheat location and before i asked Lavitt to never post any more pics of me on any site. Dude there were some not so pretty or it expose the mere fact that i was ashamed to be there. Jk! I miss when D and i, along with the rest of the cutting police would go out and we’d cause wreckage. We use to own LA and now were just visitors. We use to have so much fun, not that i dont now. But being younger you’re care free at a different degree. I guess starting to club at 15 will get ya in trouble. We didn’t give a fuck about nada. Therefore im pretty sure that’s the reason we’ve gotten thrown out of every hip bar in LA but somehow asked to come back. Weirded out!

I scored more Morrissey tickets! woooooooooooooooooooooooooo and i have no idea what im wearing to Coachella shit shit shit. Shopping wooo. So im gonna go with this D&G look. i bought the exact pants already. Not diggin that white shirt so we'll spice it up.

A letter to Debbie harry and My gayness

Mon, 19 Apr 2004 18:17:55 GMT

Dear DEBORAH HARRY
Stop the madness! I love you, Blondie was one of my favorite bands growing up. I recall dancing around screaming the jams on top of my parents bed in my chonies. I forgave you when you came out with that shit about Maria in the late 90’s. But please you’re starting to look like the white Whitney cracked out Houston. Saw you on divas live and i was ashamed. Debbie Stop now! retire with pride. You use to ooze glam. Now you’re just oozing.
You’re starting to look like blanche deveraux.
Sincerely a concerned fan.
The main Squeeze

p.s ive attached proof

Gayness at it’s purest of forms, part 1 When a girl can touch your bum and get really close to your weiner and not cause a reaction. Then baby there’s no questions on gods mind. You fucken gay! This story begins one bloody Sunday morning. (Yesterday) After a stressful and very depressing week. I decided to treat my self to a day at the spa and some amoeba shopping. I had never had a message by a girl before but i took a risk. Now i aint no sex hater but girls just dont give it like guys. Literally! What i meant is guys by nature are stronger and when im getting a massage. I want to feel the smallest cell tingle in that pleasurable pain. But i went with Wendy Hun, A little umpa lumpa Asian girl with glasses. So now im not being a sicko but anytime i’ve gotten a massage things tend to grow when hands get to close to comfort. Its not a sexual thing, fully that is. It’s just natural part of being a boy and getting a massage. Ok well with Wendy nothing! Nada! Not even a slight tingle of pubes fidgeting. She worked my back like a kung fu fight, it was great hetero experience.

Gayness at it’s purest of forms, part 2 I had a date Friday night. He was tall 6’3 dark Cuban Spanish and hella handsome. We went to watch kill bill vII. Now i hope he didn’t think i was more excited to see the movie than the date. But goddamn i was excited. The movie was all right. Not as crazy as the first one but it had it’s moments. I.e. the training, Elle driver, and the burial shit. It basically was just one long fucking conclusion to the essay. I loved it; i was just expecting a tad more. The date went great i wont expose, but he left at 4am no sex (for all ya dirty homos ), making out, the whole series 5 of abfab i just bought on dvd, and cuddling! His got great music taste, he drives, and has a job. Wooo qualified for a second date! Good times.

Amoeba shopping
1. Echo
2. Living in a Magazine [IMPORT] -- Zoot Woman
3. Gling glo- bjork i only had it on vynil
4. Chutes Too Narrow ~ The Shins

SMILING BACK AT ME

Thu, 15 Apr 2004 18:43:50 GMT

Stonies Party
Last night after my hockey game i went to Mrs. S’s house for a Torrance smoke out and viewing of kill bill vol. I. Had fun times with the wanna be white Asian kids who are really brown. WEIRDED OUT.good times. God no matter how many times i watch that movie, It gives me a boner! Its’ perfectly cast it. Daryl Hannah is so flawless, I’m going to pee myself when her an uma tear that shit down.

White Funeral
the Funeral is Saturday. At the benefit we raised enough money to get Billy a kick ass floral arrangement. Thanks to everyone. It was awesome. Apparently he wanted everyone to wear white. I find that to be so much more appropriate for some reason. I want that 2 at my funeral and i want music playing through out the thing. Stuff i use to love. But yesterday driving home i was listening to Janet and it hit me. Billy is gone 4 eva. He use to live for MJ but this song to me is so appropriate for him when i was jamming to it.
Together again

In heaven we will be together
Together again baby
Everywhere I go
Every smile I see
I know you are there
Smilin' back at me
Dancin' in the moonlight
I know you are free

fuck yea
PJ Harvey New Album
PJ Harvey's seventh album 'Uh Huh Her' – the follow up to 2001's Mercury Prize-winning 'Stories From The City, Stories From The Sea' – will be released by Island Records on the 31st May 2004, 8th June in the US. The album will be preceded by single 'The Letter', out 17th May.
God she’s amazing

Coachella is a few weeks away exciting shit

The boys</b>
The boys at the island of fire. Why am i doing the liza hand?

RIP BIlly the IV

Tue, 13 Apr 2004 16:45:27 GMT

No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow.
Euripides

It’s a scary thought to realize that we can wake up tomorrow and some of our loved people are gone. It puts everything and everyone into perspective. I hope that i’ve done a good job at showing and telling my friends and family how much i care for them. Besides the grief of loss; It would kill me more for that person to leave this world unknowing how much they’ve meant to me. It’s like sometimes we focus on people’s faults instead of people’s strengths. Then when it’s to late, you get the: remember when he did this, remember how funny he was, remember blab bah.
Death is horrid thing . You will not see that person for a while. That’s if you believe in heaven (which i do) or any sort of nirvana establishment that is. It hurts and your soul never fully heals, but death is also the beginning. My friend Billy passed away on Sunday. This is Basically, taken from the Palm Springs paper.
” Police are searching for a hit and run driver who killed a man last night, Palm Springs Police Department reported.
The suspect vehicle is described as a 1998 to 2000
S-10 Chevrolet Blazer and pickup of unknown color. It would have damage on the right front bumper and possibly the headlight, police reported. Around 11 p.m. Sunday, a man identified as William Powell, 24, of Orange, crossed from the Park Inn and Palm Court Inn hotels in the 2000 block of North Palm Canyon Drive, police reported. The suspect vehicle was traveling southbound on the road, struck Powel land and fled. Powell was transported to Desert Regional Medical Center in Palm Springs where he later died. Anyone with information call 323-8125 or 323-8115.”
Nelly Rodriguez

HE was an awesome kid. Never ever had anything horrid to say about anyone. If anything through out time people fucked him over cause he was so nice. A few memories .I met him years ago ass wee child trough our raving phase. He even had a little crush on me at one point. He lived with my best friend at one point, that house was pure madness. Party central. We would all sit in his room and watch hours of porn, laugh and then go out and party. That’s where Billy introduced me to the American way. One of my fav porn’s to date. hahha. Just Crazy shit ! He was part of the beach crowd. He was always around and it’s gonna be tough not seeing him around. His house was always open to whoever. This really sucks........

Tonight thanks to Jewels and Brother Bear, i’ve set up a fundraiser thingy to help Billy’s mom out. If your around town or can send any kind of donation it will greatly be appreciated. Im also in talks with other L.A friend promoters to do this at several clubs. But tonight the wonderful jewels and company will help out at Mary’s. She’s absolutely amazing and crazy. Check her out

www.jewelsproductions.com

at the beach summer ago

LOOKING HOT

kiss me

Fri, 09 Apr 2004 17:05:34 GMT

Wacky club theories
I ventured into the mass abomination of gay twink life in Hollywood. Tiger trick!
Now in all great disgust i must admit i had a blast! They moved it to the arena, a huge venue. The set up of the club was very N. Y. maybe that’s why it made me giggly. It reminded me of Roxxy. I didn’t really want to drink so what’s the next best thing, get stoned! Whoop whoop! Gawd was it a trip! I’m so critical. I’ll sit there and analyze peoples pattern of behavior. Like certain people will make certain gestures i.e. the check you out look to let ya know they want to be pounced on. Then there’s the one’s that ya know took hours to get ready look hot yet they’re so insecure in their bones that it riddles trough their eyes, very unsexed. Last my favorite the straight out hoe! Who will shake all his momma gave him near you and straight out tell you “ we would make a cute couple”. HA it’s not fun when the chase gets cut short, if you know what i mean. I could write a book! Anyhow my friends rock! I love the fact that were so care free, fuck you, punk, slut, bitch, ass, with gorgeous shoes about everything sort of thing. That were just there to have a fucken good time and fuck any scene. Yer there to party so enjoy it! Got lots of compliments on the outfit. Finally Diesel came out with a hot line again. There past two lines i detested. So i was sporting the new-collar shirt and the what i like to call kratt huckabery fin jean shorts, black addidas, moschino bracelet, and a skulled up modern amusement shirt. Very a la Vivienne Westwood looks! It probably had some relation to the fact that all day i kept listening to iggy pop, joy division, and siouxsie all day long.

TAI FOOD AT 3 AM IS THE SHIIITTTT

ones of the best albums ever
i like re getting obsessed with great shit.

be good to me
Let me just say i hate when people let me down. Especially people i’ve known for over a decade. Perfection is just theory and by no means is it an expectation. People can’t be sane and proper all the time. But besides my wacko jacko personality once you get to me intimately im very sensible and loyal. Therefore when my good friends or family hurt my feelings. I dont tend to forget. When you’re in my tight circle of friends, id give my life for yo ass. I guess if i dont feel that you would do the same it makes me a sad penguin. I’m one of those toons that forgive but can’t forget. It’s quite self destructive, i do recognize! I says recognize!

one of thee hottest men alive
ya know who it is right?

Long Beach sky

Wed, 07 Apr 2004 06:17:59 GMT

i’m not a poet
nor do i rhyme,
there’s just moments that inspire
making us think we can fly ,
tonight i looked to the heavens
just happened to cry ,
no stars tinkling, dreams, hopes, or strangers cries,
no one could wish or romance under the stars.
pure black solitude dancing with one strange hazy light.
the tango of my life?
dark canvas with big white light speaks
sensuality , beauty, togetherness, or just the word sad .
universe can’t stop growing seems he shares that with i ,
breath breath ...
did he happen to look up tonight?
remembering our times
no mourning just feelings,
inner deepness,
just plain nice,
Remember this isn't a poem
for sure i can’t rhyme
last hopeless ponder when i got inspired tonight
did my future lover look up at the exact same time?
More importantly did we wish the same thoughts?

Give me a wet dream

Mon, 05 Apr 2004 18:29:04 GMT

This weekend could not have ended better. Well im sure technically it could of if my dream from last night became a reality. I still have yet to experience a wet dream. Have i gone trough puberty? Maybe there’s something wrong with me? Maybe i shouldn’t have been dirty dancing boys at such a young age. Regardless the point is i’ve never had a wet dream and damn it i want one. I hear that you have orgasms in your sleep. How wonderful is that. No hassles, no work, just beautiful mental movie and then Kaboom! Ahhhh ... i wonder if people make sex faces when having sexual dreams? That’s kind of hot if you dont mind me saying so. So here’s the dream. Im lying on my bed. Face down Red/ black-stripped diesel briefs on. It’s summer because i can feel the breeze of my fan hitting my naked back. I have my headphones on. I’m sure i was listening to bjork . I started touching my self. Not to rough sort of just caressing to the rhythm. I closed my eyes as my pelvis moved in a rather familiar beat. My cock was beginning to get aroused. So i stopped. I turned around eyes still closed but kept touching myself. This time i actually began to stroke. My dick was hard and beginning to pre cum. The blood was rushing to my head and i could feel my body tingling. I suddenly opened my eyes to look at my self on my full-length mirrors only to find Ian somerhalder sitting in my lounge chair no shirt on tight jeans looking intensely at me. He had one hand down his pants the other caressing his chest. He got up said something but i couldn’t hear what he said. He came towards me, my hand still down my pants. He was walking towards me and undressing himself. ...He kissed me ... and the rest is up to your imagination...

the dream went on for a long time

there was a lot of this but switch arooooo style.

Prince-
Erotic city here i come. Finally scored good prince floor tickets for 85.00 bucks plus the insane service charge. The last time ticket master actually gave me awesome seats was like 99 during the depeche mode greatest hits tour when i got 4 row. Other than that im always at the broker. Yay yay yay. June 5th will be a good day.

Sat, 03 Apr 2004 00:52:33 GMT

Today i took short day and called up Cindy to go up and see Rozz Williams’s ashes and go trough old Christian death shit and laugh at gitane demone and all the crazy shit they use to do. Yesterday was the anniversary of his death eek how time flys. How people change and how the world after you die may or may not remember you. So we watched PIG the nico B film rozz was involved in before he died. We went though scary Goth phase’s pictures. Me at helter skelter, Cindy macking out at kontrol factory and even a skinny very speed induced Jason lavitt in a ruffled shirt at coven 13. We smoked a bowl in honor of the deceased as we watched the funeral video tape of gitane demone going extra dramatic crazy grabbing for the ashes on top of the canyon, little did she know it was just flour. I just got home and im listening to the tapes that have never or ever will be released by Christian death , my favorite showing how gay even goth icons can be. Rozz singing Dancing queen and Erasure. I also busted out my shadow project cd and god damn that duo between Eva o and rozz is killer. Hahhahhahhah im also wearing the patsy abfab shirt he got in Germany.

This weekend should be fun
Costume party tonight. I still have no idea what im going to be

Saturday
Im going to go see boy George spin at the highlands.should be marvelous

Sunday study brainy

P.S i re did my journal check out the bjorkie backround

la bouche

Thu, 01 Apr 2004 22:12:51 GMT

tres chic
My new obsession for summer is to find me a white suit. I’ve always wanted one. Not your regular Sunday soul preachers white Steve Harvey outfit. But a sleek crazy le chic one, my first bet was diesel stylelab. No luck so im leaning towards this Comme de Garcons one. i dunno . I’ve also cut my spending account to a quarter of what i was spending. I need to save money for shopping during my vacation. Ohh the void ness. If only i could sugga up some daddy without being completely repulse by the idea these days.

les music
My lovely friend ex partner in bed Jonathan from the Europe’s finally sent me the MESH cd” Who watches over me” i just couldn’t find it anywhere. Let me tell you its a great fucken piece of electronic pop. I cant believe to imagine why they are not huge in the us of A. ohh wells im sure it will happen . hahha it always use to amuse me to call them EBM. I still dont fully understand that genre label. to me they’re so just synthpop some songs bordering industrial. Rock out with your cock out

Golden girl
I feel utterly old . Today i got a VIPs email for this club at the ruby called club nineties. How sad for my generation and me. This also coincides with the fact that i heard nirvana on 95.5 classic rock. Ya know once a club is dedicated to a decade it means time has past you by. Oh well time to grab my walker and shake it to TLC and Sonic youth.

PS when the fuck are they releasing golden girls on dvd. sheetz

Can't go wrong in helmut lang

Mon, 29 Mar 2004 19:56:21 GMT

Sat i was feeling down and low. No specific reason i cant pin point and squeeze the problem. So what’s a boy to do but grab a credit card and fulfill the void ness with some shopping. It’s therapy all right. So i grabbed Barney and we were on our way to L.A. i stopped by Keith’s house and he made lunch and we played video games. I really just wanted to be by myself. Ya know we all need that self-reflection time. So i pulled up into barneys. Grabbed a cocktail and started charging. The Helmut Lang spring summer stuff is so amazing. I got me two Helmut Lang shirts, a Helmut Lang sweater, some diesel style lab shorts, and a pair of costume national boots (which im returning) it was a compulsive buy. I walked down window shopped rodeo drive. Freaked the fuck out when i re saw the Amanda Lepore Mont Blanc ads and got a little teary when i walked by Frida my favorite restaurant that i haven’t been to since adriel. Later that night The Loretta’s (markie, crepella, spencie) tore up the bars from what i remember there was to much Madonna playing, crazy trolls attacking, and a man jo in the bathroom. Yup-good times.

South beach is on July 21-27th

Fri, 26 Mar 2004 18:09:00 GMT

Bi sexual people suck!
THEYRE FUCKED UP!
So i had din din with Adam last night the boy i met a week or so ago and everything is going swell. I must first say, passion about one subject is such a turn on to me. I mean i live to argue and if you can stand your ground and debate with me with the passion of Christ about the tiniest of things then by golly we can make babies. I think that’s why music freaks and artist gurus are my weakness. Passion. Of course once in a while you need a bitch that has nothing to say, but that’s a whole different story. That’s the lets hump dont speak story. Anyhow i was talking about how much better Chagall cubism is then Picassos. How Pablo is so overrated. Blah blah anyhow we were arguing and laughing so loud at one point i lost track of the conversation and inside myself i stopped. Looked at him and thought i could just do it right here right now. It was hot!
Then Hiroshima blew up. We got into the topic of the different people we’ve dated. He then said umm btw im bisexual. Lordie! I dont think one can have the hopes of being in a kool monagamus relationship with some one that is bi. Not that i was thinking that so soon but ya know certain things will block the path 4 eva. Bi sexual basically means bi polar of the genitals. So i made it clear i wouldn’t ever date someone that is bi for the mere reason i dont play roulette at the casino you loose quickly. He wasnt to thrilled. But just cause you dont gamble you can’t go see the showgirls. If you know what i mean hahhaha!

Lust is to the other passions what the nervous fluid is to life; it supports them all, lends strength to them all ambition, cruelty, avarice, revenge, are all founded on lust.
Marquis De Sade

Morrissey
I want Morrissey tickets so bad so so so so so incredibly bad. I was thinking of the last time i saw him at Coachella the first one like 4 years ago. It was beyond amazing. Hot rebel boy city. It’s so funny that these “str8” mostly Mexican greasers adore him. I dont understand why beyond the hair. They’re even kool with making out with guys cause of Morrissey. Not That i wouldn’t know ;).

Surfing
I really want to learn how to surf. Dont ask me why. Maybe my love for dolphins. Anyhow i need to find someone to teach me.

Wed, 24 Mar 2004 17:33:49 GMT

alright well i was gonna wait to update until i had time to upload the crazy XXX palm springs photos. but i guess i'm an lj slut these days. last night in tuesday night ritual. Jacob and i watch the season Finale of Am. Next top model in all red wine glory.
i had predicted my two favorite bitches would end in the finals and they did, i should get a blowjob or something. anyhow i nearly had a heartattack .

THEY HAD NOTHING ON HER

OHH IM GONNA START STALKING JAY MANUEL.. TILL I BONE HIM ..HIS DDDDDEEEEELICIOUS

IN OTHER NEWS I FINALLY JOINED MY SPACE, BUDDY ME CEAZKAT@AOL.COM INCASE YER ALL LAZY

WAITING FOR MY RIDE

Sat, 20 Mar 2004 03:16:23 GMT

PALM SPRINGS HERE WE COME. WHAT EVER HAPPENS IN PS STAYS IN PS

Our Picasso

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 17:34:55 GMT

When future generations look at our art history, this man Mr. Mathew Barney will be considered the Picasso of our time. Now this has nothing to do with my obsession with his work. if you've been in my room you know what im talking about.His just a pure genious! Anyways, Last night i experienced an ultimate orgasm. I got to see Cremaster 1 on the big screen. Now I've seen all the pieces At the Guggenheim N.Y. when the exhibit was there. But it was always a dream of mine to see it in a theatre. Anyhow if you're in Los angeles go check them out. they're playing 1&2 back to back.$5. Now its not the same order you're suppost to watch them in but so what! Then you can come to my house and watch Cremaster 3, i own it =).

Cremaster 1 Sypnosis. it will make you comprehend it more seeing there's no dialogue

CREMASTER 1 - (45 minutes) (1995) CREMASTER 1 is a musical revue performed on the blue Astroturf playing field of Bronco Stadium in Boise, Idaho -- Barney's hometown. Two Goodyear Blimps float above the arena like the airships that often transmit live sporting events via television broadcast. Four air hostesses tend to each blimp. The only sound is soft ambient music, which suggests the hum of the engines. In the middle of each cabin interior sits a white-clothed table, its top decorated with an abstract centerpiece sculpted from Vaseline and surrounded by clusters of grapes. In one blimp the grapes are green, in the other they are purple. Under both of these otherwise identical tables resides Goodyear (played by Marti Domination). Inhabiting both blimps simultaneously, this doubled creature sets the narrative in motion. After prying an opening in the tablecloth(s) above her head, she plucks grapes from their stems and pulls them down into her cell. With these grapes, Goodyear produces diagrams that direct the choreographic patterns created by a troupe of dancing girls on the field below. The camera switches back and forth between Goodyear's drawings and aerial views of the chorus girls moving into formation: their designs shift from parallel lines to the figure of a barbell, from a large circle to an outline of splitting and multiplying cells, and from a horizontally divided field emblem (Barney's signature motif) to a rendering of an undifferentiated reproductive system (which marks the first six weeks of fetal development). Gliding in time to the musical score, the chorus girls delineate the contours of a still-androgynous gonadal structure, which echoes the shapes of the two blimps overhead, and symbolizes a state of pure potential.

come with me!

Thu, 18 Mar 2004 17:42:00 GMT

This is exactly how i feel. St patty i hate you!
There was no gold to be found anywhere. Tommorow we leave for a Palm Springs weekend hoooray!

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This is exactly how i feel. St patty i hate you!
There was no gold to be found anywhere. Tommorow we leave for a Palm Springs weekend hoooray!

<img src="http://www.tuesdaycomic.com/dizzy.jpg" alt"="sick" />

heres a list of upcoming shows i want to attend. if you wanna be tied in crime , let me know!

<b>Blonde Redhead- 3/21
Alvin Ailey - 3/24-28
The Breeders - 3/30
Coachella - 5/1-2
X- 6/18</b>

Molest me please

Wed, 17 Mar 2004 18:46:42 GMT

Here’s some San Diego pics
some crazies hand is molesting me

surprise

mommy dragqueen help

I should really start taking pictures before we get stoned or drunk. Yet these funny faces crack me up. According to Zan we we’re crazy .That night was scandalous! Who knew SD boys could party!

LACMA
Went to LACMA with dominkee to see the frida, Diego Rivera stuff they have going on right now. Beautiful. I tried devising a mental plan to steal my friducha but i didn’t want to end up on the 11 o’clock news. We saw the disturbing yet beautiful photos of Diane Arbus She basically was a sicko who photographed, tranies, showgirls, freaks and retarded people. Some say she might have been showing the human beauty of abnormality. But i think she just got off on it. Anyhow check it out it’s well worth it.

Venice
Hopefully this weekend in Palm Springs i can debut my swimsuit. When we arrived at Venice it was to cold to tan. Btw i decided Venice is one scary fucken drugged LSD place.

i have a date!
Was at the library (queer coffeehouse by my joint) last night, doing homework. A boy came up. His name is Adam. I have a date tomorrow or next week. His 21, seems artsie, a car, job, and goes to school. PREQUALIFED! his a Taurus, i dunno about that.L no hopes up. But it’s always exciting to be approached. Haha my i-book and fav. diesel hoodie always racked them in like cattle!

Take the quiz: "Which American City Are You?"

New York
You're competative, you like to take it straight to the fight. You gotta have it all or die trying.

Rub it till it bleeds

Fri, 12 Mar 2004 19:16:23 GMT

LACMA and Venice Saturday should be exciting. I bought my 2004 swimsuit wooooo
. I’ll post pics of my sexy bod later in the week. I love it , love it, i love it! it brings out my j-lo butt and package quite nicely. Bringing back the old school remember!!
Moschino! Top model bitches got nothing on me

Tonight San Diego bars and Clubs. I have no idea where we’re going but i’ve decided to get my early drink on. Yup it’s all about happy hour after work or maybe even during lunch.. hollllaaaaa.

Sunday is mommies bday <3 what a better way to spend it then at an Indian Reservation. Im taking her to Pachanga. Let the dice roll.

"life and death. energy and peace. if i stopped today, it was still worth it. even the terrible mistakes that i have made, and would have unmade if i could. the pains that have burned me and scarred my soul. It was worth it for having been allowed to walk where i've walked, which was to hell on earth, heaven on earth, back again, into, under, far in-between, though it, in it and above..."- GIA

Celebrity death match

Tue, 09 Mar 2004 19:51:39 GMT

Dr. Vaginal Crème Davis VS James St. James

Now Friday night was a smooth ride down socialinna lane. Brother bear i.e. Markie and Myself headed out for some debauchery action. Indeed mission was accomplished seeing that we ended up waking up the next day in someone’s car in the middle of silver lake. The night was pure glamour as two pure legends fought for our attention. Not completely true, but it was such a hard decision to decide which dear homo to play with. We decided on Vaginal’s avant-garde gathering at the parlour first. It was great times. Not your usual vag crowd but a fabulous wanna be velvet underground band was performing when we arrived. We hung out with the southern belle whom i might add was a little on the down side. Ohh vag hope ya feel better.
The night proceeds as we went to a Party hosted by the original drug child party monster himself Mr. James St. James. It was grand. The night went by so fast. It was tons of fun. God i had missed L.A..

LEGENDARY DR. VAGINAL CREEM and MY PIGEON LOOK

JAMES ST JAMES

Is someone partying like a monster again>?

Roxxie the Mexican trannie Heart

BROTHER LOVE

Porn trash

Fri, 05 Mar 2004 19:57:37 GMT

I was taken out to dinner by the owners of http://www.fpocorp.com to get an input on what would work for their gay website and see if i was the man for their job. The owners are this swinging trashy riverside gothic/fetish couple. Ya know all renaissance fair looking and what not. They are friends with my friend Cassandra and old school Goth friend of mine, who referred me. I use to dance at Sinematic with her and now apparently she owns her very own dungeon. She was telling me about her spinning wheel. I want to ride it. Basically they put you in this wheel of fortune thingy that rotates you around as they’re whipping you. No whips for me but i'd gladly do it to any takers. Anyhow i was hired to build their market plan that caters to the fetish, twink and bear communities. This should put me to do some very interesting research. Also means after a couple of years i will venture back into the LA Goth fetish club scene to get an idea of the personalities surrounding it these days. I’m sure it hasn’t changed. It should be Good extra money too and they promised me free porn gay porn woooooooooooo.

Scissor Sisters
Finally my import cd with all the fancy shit arrived. Fuck you int. airmail. Anyhow they’ve become marches cd obsession. Ya know that cd you’ll play out cause it’s the greatest thing you’ve heard. Well im predicting they will become the next icon-sensation since fisherspooner. The cd is pure genius. They’re like a mix between, Shakespears sisters, Bowie, and Goldfrapp . Incredible! Makes ya want to groove. My jam of course being comfortably numb.
There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship floats on the horizon.
You're only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse
out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on [it],
the child has grown,
the dream is gone.
I..I..I've become comfortably numb
I..I..I've become comfortably numb
Ohhhhhhh lallalla

Sometimes things seem to be going so well yet the feeling of loneliness does not leave, the weekend is here finally /b>